Now that I’ve settled into my new space, I decided it was time to indulge in a little “retail therapy” (oh, sorry — just gagged a bit. I hate that turn of phrase, though I’m not gonna lie, it evokes the spirit of the experience pretty well). I’m not going to lie and say I’m never going to shop big box stores again — though I am trying to be more selective about which ones I frequent — but I am making a point to support small, local, and queer or queer-positive creators when I can.
To that end, here are the first of several small shops I’ve recently made purchases at, and would gladly recommend:
The first is Liberal Jane Illustrations, who has explicitly politically charged artwork in vibrant, beautiful colors. Their prints are digital downloads, so you can print your own at home for between $5 and $10. I recently purchased three, and I am in love with them:
Forgive the off-angle of the last one, I put these up and subsequently photographed them on a sunny weekend, and the glare was relentless, haha. Anyway, their use of color is fantastic and I am utterly in love with these prints — they make my queer, non-binary heart sing.
The other shop I just got an order from is BrittsGeekBoutique, who sells amazing fandom-themed stickers:
In love.
I have more orders coming in over the next several days, including a fairly large order from a local shop, and I’m excited to share with you all. Buying little treats is always nice; nicer still when you are supporting small, queer creators (especially as a small, queer creator!)
To that end, news about upcoming gallery showing and art shows soon. Very excited.
Hope you are all doing well. Take care of yourselves, and each other.
I spent last night lounging on my new sectional, watching Severance and completing my first piece of art since November, whaaat??!
I’m so psyched to have the time and space (mental, emotional, and physical) to be creating again. I’m very proud of the illustration I finished last night, and equally proud of another one that I made significant progress on this weekend (though I haven’t quite finished it yet). I hit a massive roadblock in November when we both started prepping for the move and my digital pen mysteriously disappeared. I started a few sketches in late December and early January that I then had to sit on (scanner was packed away, and I start most of my drawings as traditional pencil sketches that I then scan), and the last few weeks I’ve barely had time or energy to think, let alone work.
But this weekend ushered in the start of my Winter Break, as well as the first weekend where I could look around the house and call it, in some respects, done. I mean, are there still things to be done? I mean, yeah — but there will always be things to be done, you know? Still, he house is furnished, it has a system of organization, and everything is unpacked. Do I still have to finish setting up the studio? Do we still need to haul all our packing trash and empty bins out to the shed/curbside? Yes. Does my wife still have to install all her custom bookshelves? Oh, hell yes.
But overall, the house is beginning to look like a home. It looks put together and cohesive and lived in and comfortable. Which means I can start being creative again.
I’ve started being active on Cara, and am in the process of moving a (slightly more curated) archive of my work over there, and all new art going forward will likewise be posted to Cara. I follow a lot of trans, disabled, and POC creators on Instagram, so I will retain a passive presence there in order to support them, as I know that for several of them, it is a primary (or sole) source of income. But I myself will not be posting new art there going forward.
I hope all is going well for all of you. I am excited and motivated and actually enjoying the process of creating art again. I hope you all are finding your motivation and passion.
My loves, my lovelies, my darlings and dorklings —
— I have successfully moved.
I love my new house. I adore the open concept, I adore my porch, and my deck, and my backyard. I love my huge kitchen and all my storage space. I love my studio — fuck, I have a a studio!! I am absolutely enamoured with this house and so excited with what’s ahead here.
But holy shit, what a state it is in, ha haha.
My sister came by today and we made incredible headway in terms of unpacking — I think I unpacked four huge tote bins, and three or four huge moving boxes, as well as moving several boxes from the main living space to storage.
And I got my new digital pen!! I spent a little bit of time last night and this evening inking some sketches and oh my God, it feels so good to be back. I am thrilled to be drawing again, and can’t wait to make more art now that I have an actual studio space! Argh, I’m so hype, you guys.
The next, ugh, week or so will likely be spent unpacking and cleaning, but by mid-February — coinciding with my break — I should be ready to spend time on things like art again. Exciting.
Social media is becoming — ha, I mean, more so than previously — an absolute cesspool. I want no part of the Metaverse, and I long jumped ship from the hellmouth that is Twitter/X.
The problem is, of course, that for a whole slew of small creators — including BIPOC, disabled, neurodivergent, queer, and trans creators — their Metaverse platforms are their livelihood.
I am not one of those people, luckily, so going forward I will not be posting my work on said platforms. I will be removing my content and republishing to Cara instead, and my website link will reflect this change. I will, however, continue to lift up the voices of those still on the platform — the BIPOC, disabled, LGBTQ+ creators — unless or until they are able to find a viable platform elsewhere.
So yeah, all this to say, lights out on all my Meta platforms going forward. I’ll be adding more to my Cara account tonight and linking it as a replacement for my Instagram portfolio. I will have to wait until next week to remove content from my Instagram, as I have an active zine application out using it as my portfolio.* Acceptances go out the 27th, so after I’m settled in post-move, I’ll start clearing things out.
Hope all is well in your neck of the woods. Well… as well as it can be, given… you know. Everything.
Take care of yourselves, and each other.
* The zine is called OC: Original Classics, and its concept is drawing your own original characters in the style of/paying homage to famous classic works of art. It’s such a fun concept; I made two pitches, but if I get in my current front-runner for what I’d like to do (and honestly, which I will likely draw regardless of my own acceptance or rejection) is my fae character in the style of Leyendecker’s “The Century, August…”
Shit, have I really gone more than three weeks without an update?
What can I say? The world is a shitshow, and I — as a uterus-possessing, queer, nonbinary neurodivergent educator — am angry.
But I’m also ready to fight. And fighting is gonna look different for everyone. For me, it’s going to be finding community, making art, and using that art to spread awareness, raise money, and mobilize.
But I’ve also gotta take care of myself, too.
We’re closing on a house a week from today. Exciting, I know. I’ve been on an art hiatus since November, amidst all the craziness in both the world and my personal life (in terms of a relentless onslaught of crises at work and the stress of coordinating the buying/selling of a house — don’t worry, my personal life is in good shape, it’s just stressful at the moment) and I’m looking forward to having the time and space and emotional energy to work on art again.
In the wake of all the chaos around me, I am trying to find what works for me as self-care.
★ Doing morning pages/brain dumping has been wonderful. I have a tabbed and annotated Google doc that I treat like a commonplace book. I keep lists of the books I’m reading, household projects I want to work on, to-do lists, and all manner of venting, rambling, tea spilling, and it has been — a game changer in some ways. Just getting everything out of my head in the mornings has made the rest of the day go so much more smoothly.
★ Taking a multivitamin and actually drinking 64 ounces of water a day, which has made such an impact on my energy levels, I can’t even tell you. The last several days, I didn’t even consume my customary second caffeinated beverage of the day, and I didn’t get my equally customary caffeine withdrawal headache…! Is it possible what I had been assuming was pure caffeine withdrawal might actually have been, at least in part, chronic dehydration???
★ Making time to read and language learn again. This time I’m focusing on Esperanto, and reading speculative fiction by queer and female authors. It’s been going great. I’ve already read four books this year, but that’s another story for another day. Just doing something for me that’s not focused on producing, that doesn’t expect something out of me, but is just something to take in, to tickle my brain and expand my mind a bit while I sit in the comfort of my living room after dinner has been rewarding.
★ Doing A Million Things…, which yes, maybe I should have been a little more generous with the time allotted, given how crazy my schedule has been lately. Still, I plug away. Still, I stagger onwards. All we can ever really do, right? I genuinely enjoy puttering away at my embroidery sampler, and I bet I’ll enjoy it even more when I have a dedicated space in which to do it.
I hope you find those things that make you feel cared for. I hope you and yours are safe. I hope you and yours find peace amongst yourself, strength amongst your community, comfort in the arms of one another, and a renewed energy to fight.
Last year I did an “I Wanna Draw…” Bingo card that I took several liberties with (in terms of listing goals that went beyond drawing prompts), and so for this year created a broader Art Bingo card for myself.
I’ll include a blank copy for anyone who likewise wants to fill it out; just link back to me if you use it, I’d like to see what other people aspire to in the upcoming year.
In all likelyhood, this will be my last post of 2024. I hope you all have a restful New Year, and I look forward to sharing great things with you all in 2025.
Reflections on a year, a.k.a., holy shit, Arisia and The Glow Show were almost a year ago??
So, hard to believe, but 2024 is almost over, and I’m trying to build a retrospective on the things I’ve accomplished this year. I took a step back from art shows after the summer — having done multiple in quick succession drained me — but the earlier half of the year was front loaded with a lot of them.
January brought The Glow Show, which was amazing fun and the first time I really branched out and did some mixed-media work in order to incorporate luminscent paint into an already luminous/neon print. The effect was incredibly cool, especially under the black light. Arisia was, as always, mid-January as well, and this past Arisia marked my second time as a panelist, and it was just as satisfying as the first. The camaraderie on my creative panels was super uplifting and validating, as was getting chased down in the hotel lobby the next day by a man who recognized me and needed to tell me how “seen” he felt after hearing me speak. That was honestly one of the highlights of the con for me.
March brought Looking Up, Looking Down, and brought another gallery into our consciousness that has become a favorite of ours to exhibit at. Watertown is a way to drive to drop off a piece, but the exhibit space is right next to the Deluxe Town Diner, which is an incredible little eatery that we absolutely go to every time we’re up that way. Kira made her first art show sale here, a gorgeous piece called “Oceanid,” though the timing and location meant we missed the reception, sadly.
May was Kalediscope: Queer Visions at the Boston Figurative Arts (which we attended after a quick stop at Ebi Sushi, which I hadn’t been to in probably about fifteen years, but was just as good as I remembered) Oh my God, what a vibe that place has! The reception was easily in my top three of all time, it was such a chill, supportive, creative, vibrant queer space, and it’s too bad the gallery was a pop up that only lasted a week. I would have loved to have brought so many people there. It was also the show that introduced me (literally and artistically) to Sarah Rose Smiley, and oh my heart, I am in love with her paintings — the ones involving hair braiding/cutting and applying makeup resonate with me in a visceral way, for reasons I cannot take time to explore at this juncture, ha ha.
Oh! The BFA is also right next to Make and Mend, which is a secondhand art and craft supply shop that had actually been a topic of discussion at my Arisia panel back in January! Not taking trips into Somerville frequently means I’d never really explored it, but it’s exceptionally cool and you can make purchases online, as well!
June was Off the Beaten Path and Queer Here. Queer Here had the benefit of being in Newburyport (a town I love that’s only about 30 minutes away) and having a lovely reception — there’s nothing like a summer night spent looking at art, sipping free wine, and chatting with other artsy, queer, trans folks about being artsy, queer, and trans, ha ha.
Off the Beaten Path was also lovely, though, as our friend Aimee was also exhibiting. The folks running the Dolphin Gallery are hella cool, and make the trip up to Worcester worth it. Oh! And Aimee sold a piece here! I almost forgot. So that was also cool. Afterwards, Kira and I, Aimee, Patrick, and Sarah went out for some awesome Korean street food.
July was Fiesta en la Calle, where we also exhibited with Aimee, and this time was complimented by some incredible Mexican food courtesy of Los Tres Garcia. We got to mingle and chat with some fellow artists, shop some local vendors, and sit in on a few workshops about the wonders of Procreate (look, I’m not an Apple fan, but I have to admit I was impressed. I bought my son Procreate shortly thereafter; props to Marianna for convincing us it was worth it, ha ha).
Around the same time, I got word that I was an Uplifting Visions finalist for the second year in a row, which means The Massachusetts Coalition for Suicide Prevention paid me $300 for use of one of my digital painting in their social media campaigns, which was gratifying on many levels.
The Fall and Winter have been quiet; I moved my focus to work — there have been staffing and medical issues in my department that I had to do a lot of legwork and coverage for — and of course November (and December) have been taken up primarily with the in-and-outs of buying and selling a house.
(Which — awesome news on that front! — but I will likely save that for later in January.)
There are yet more things on the horizon — one personal, one work related, and two creative projects — that I am thrilled and excited to talk about, but am not yet at liberty to. Rest assured, y’all will know as soon as I’m able to let you know.
For the new year, I have my Million Things I Haven’t Done Project looming on the horizon, as well as a fresh new Art Bingo card (that I’m still piecing together), so of course, I’m looking forward to that as well.
Hope you can all reflect back fondly/proudly on your year.
Oh! I also got the final, crowdfunded, special edition run of The Fat Folks Tarot, which — not gonna lie — I had almost forgotten about. That project holds a special place in my heart, and I will always be proud and honored at having been a part of it, and raising over $16,000 for Trans Lifeline.
The set is beautiful. Even though the art I contributed is nearly four years old by now, I’m still fond of it, even with all it’s imperfections.
Oh my God, isn’t it gorgeous…? Jordyn and Ruby outdid their damn selves.
So, surprising no one who has ever done it (and likely surprising few who haven’t), selling and buying a house is fucking stressful.
Our house is now officially on the market, and we’ve held two open houses — coinciding nicely with my nephew’s birthday party and a planned overnight at my parents’ house, so I had ready made excuses to make myself scarce — and have attended a few ourselves at this point.
Actually, we went so far as to make an offer on one, which got rejected — which is interesting, as it’s been on the market for a bit, is on the pricier side in this area, and did not seem to have multiple buyers vying for it — but they are clearly aiming for well over asking price.
We’ll see if it’s still there in a week or two. But, anyway.
I’m in no huge rush to move; I will feel less stressed when this is behind us, obviously, but we’re in a good spot, and so long as I can still access the stuff we’ve packed away (and I can — we opted to stage it in the garage instead of renting storage for it, which I think was a wise choice), I can do this more or less indefinitely (though obviously I’m hoping we find something sooner rather than later. My neurodivergent ass just wants this done and settled).
The impending holidays also don’t make things easier, but at the very least my shopping is done, my presents are wrapped, and the 20th is my last day of work until the New Year. Removing work from the equation doesn’t take the stress of house hunting away, but it takes the stress of house-hunting-while-working-full-time away, and that’s significant. Anything is easier when you don’t have to also work through it.
The downside to all this is, my energy reserves are tanking. I have not done any art since early November, and while I know enough not to push it while I feel this burnt out, I do have some concerns for how long this level of burnout will last. I have personal project I want to do, as well as art I had intended to gift, and at least two collabs coming up in the new year that I am hoping to have the mental and physical resources for.
One stressor I do not have this year is I am not going to be a panelist at Arisia — not only that, I am not even going to be in attendance, for the first time in over a decade. It was not a decision made lightly, but considering everything else, I think it was the right one. I plan to be back behind the panelist table in 2026.
This is a tough time of year in the best of circumstance. Hope you all are finding time to take care of yourselves and relax.
Aside from just being eternal Hamiltrash, I’ve picked the title of this post to reflect a fairly ambitious goal I have this coming year.
My sister and I have been itching to collab on something for the last few years, but could never quite settle on what. When I pitched this to her, she seemed interested¹, but we are still working out exactly what form the documentation of the project will take. YouTube channel has been tossed around, as has podcast, but a collaborative blog (like a Tumblr, that easily integrates multimedia) is also on the table.
But — hand-waving that whole debate side, the gist of the project is, we each pick a creative practice we’ve never tried, but wanted to, and devote five weeks to researching, practicing, and learning the skill, and document it (means of documentation, as mentioned, TBD).
To that end, I am compiling a list of skills I wish to explore — at five weeks each, we can fit ten new skills into 2025, so here are my Top Ten:
Ten New Creative Endeavors for 2025
Decorative Calligraphy
Embroidery/Cross-stitch
Stamp-making
Shrinkydink Graphic Jewelry
Wood Carving
Mixed Media Assemblage
Perler bead art
Paper quilling
Clothing alteration
Book sculpture
Some of these have been on my Want to Try list for literal decades — like, shrink plastic art? Quilling? My sister went through a quilling phase herself in the late 90s/early aughts, and while I was vaguely interested, I had both so little confidence and so little patience with myself that I just never undertook the endeavor. Just handwaved it away as something I “couldn’t” do.
I think I’m finally in the state of mind where I genuinely feel like with time and patience, all things are possible.
I am beyond excited to have such an ambitious plan for 2025 — this will be on top of my own creative endeavors, and I am hoping to be able to use my creative calendar to keep track of and plan each of these learning experiences.
I have even more exciting potential projects in the works that I can’t wait to share with all y’all, but (sadly) as they are collabs, I’ve gotta hold me tongue until I get the all-clear from the other participants.
What creative ambitions do y’all have in the pipeline for 2025?
¹ “She seemed interested” might be generous — intrigued might be a more fitting descriptor, as in, it sounded interesting and maybe fun, but might also be waaay too much of a time or energy commitment for her, so… should that be the case, I still intend to Do the Things, but I may simply document progress and results right here in this cozy little space instead of setting up elsewhere. Stayed tuned, I guess.
It’s hard to be grateful, living in this timeline. Living in this timeline at the crossroads of my circumstances and identities, doubly so.
Still, I’m trying. I’m trying to be cognizant of the good things I have, of the good things in my orbit, in the world at large.
So, to those ends, I felt the need to acknowledge.
I am thankful for living where I do, in a state that has been consistently ahead of the curve in legislation that defend and honor my right to marry, my right to self-identify, my right to bodily autonomy.
I am thankful to work in a field in which my neurodivergence is not only accommodated and respected, but actually gives me an edge and advantage., I am grateful to be surrounded by colleagues who value my input, seek me out for advice and consultations, and who both constantly challenge me and respect my need to rest when I need to rest.
I am thankful for my wife, who has not only never discouraged me from a goal or ambition, but actively encourages all of my silly little wishes and whims.
I am thankful for my son, who consistently amazes me with the brilliant, clever, hilarious, creative, silly things he comes up with. I am thankful for his natural curiousity and his passion for his interests.
I am thankful for my siblings, who understand me in a way that no one else does, and with whom I can be wholly myself.
I am thankful to be in a position where preparing to move is an option afforded to me — that I can afford homeownership, at a time when lot of my peers are struggling. It is a huge privilege, and being in such a position for me has been as much about luck and outside support as it had been my own efforts, and I am compelled to point that out. I am monumentally lucky.
I am thankful for hobbies that I can afford to keep as hobbies — while it might be nice to get commissioned once in a while or to sell a print or two, I am glad that my passion projects can remain passion projects, and do not have to bear the burden of being my financial bread-and-butter.
I m thankful for the people I have met on my creative journey.
I am thankful, in that regard (if not others) for the road ahead. I am excited to see where the path takes me, excited to try new mediums, embark on new projects, and meet new people.
I am thankful for the life I am living, and the people with whom I am living it.
I hope there are things you can find in your own lives to celebrate, flickers of light in the darkness.
All Your Crooked Heart 